On Being a Parent

I always love being an aunt. I have two gorgeous nephews, Matthew, almost 5 years old, and baby Christian, just 2 months old. Being an aunt means you could be the fun person for your nephews, without actually taking a full responsibility to raise them. You could bring them to fun places, buy them funky gifts, and play with them whenever you like it. And when they become more and more naughty, or cranky. you could just send them back to their parents! =)

But being a parent, was something that didn't really match my personality. I never had too much motherly instinct, and when I was a little girl, I didn't have a passion to be a mom or have many kids in the future..

So this is a very new experience for me..I don't know anything about being a parent. I couldn't even change a diaper or hold a baby in the right way! I always in panic mode when my son cries, and I even have a chill every time I call myself Mom. This is totally weird!

But who knows, I actually enjoying my new role as a Mom. Though I still don't have a courage to bath my son, and I couldn't sooth him every time he screams, I started to feel comfortable with this new chapter of my life. I never thought that I could bring myself up at 2 am, while I know that I'm not a morning person at all. Or, how I like to smell minyak telon on his body, when I know that I hated the smell so much before!

True, many criticisms are still on my way. Here are some examples:
Q: What do you give your son? Full ASI?
Me: No, I mix it with formula...
Q: Why?? ASI is the best for baby, you know. At least until 6 months, you should give your baby ASIX (aka ASI exclusive).
Me: I don't produce enough for him.
Q: How do you know? You should try first. He'll be more healthy, clever, and not easily get sick.
Me: But I tried and it's not enough.
Q: Have you tried eating daun katuk? Or kacang hijau? And drink much milk?
Me: I tried all..But its okay, I think formula is also fine for him..
Q: But it's a pity, you know...
Me: ...

Well, it's only one example of how I have to explain my way of raising my kid. Not mentioning the questions about why I hired a babysitter to help me, or why we used disposable diapers, or why I didn't shave my baby's hair when he's turn 40 days old, or why I brought my baby to Bandung although he was just 1 month old... And still many more!

At first, I was very distressed to have so many questions and criticisms pointed at me. Some of the people were being nice, just gave me ideas and suggestions. But others, argh!!! Just a bunch of annoying people with neverending questions.

But now, I try to just let them say whatever they want. This is my son, my kid, my flesh and blood. I think it's me and my guy's right to choose whatever we feel best for him. Every parent wants the best for their baby, right?

ps: and it's sooo very precious experience for me, to watch my guy holding our baby, playing with him and cherishing every moment they have. Especially, when I know that my guy was not a fatherly figure at all, and didn't like children! (although I still couldn't persuade him to change the diapers, yet! haha...)